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Still ringing… June 14, 2007

Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in baseball, brooklyn, comedy, critique, eating, food, funny, games, humor, lunch, movies, new york city, opinion, pedestrian behavior, photos, pictures, random references, restaurant, sarcasm, sports, television, yankees.

So its 1:45pm and my ears are still ringing. Somebody make it stop!!!

This wasn’t the first time my ears were left ringing (in a bad way) after a Yankee game. As you’ll remember back on April 30th, when I spoke about those “children” (i.e. heathens) who got into a screaming match above and below me.

So far today I’ve thought someone called my name, twice (neither time it was for me), I’ve heard the phone ring a few times (wasn’t ringing) and I think I even heard someone whisper “Rosebud” (I haven’t seen Citizen Kane in over a decade). So needless to say my ears are still way out of tune.

The only salvation I’ve had today was a nice plate of chicken parm from Bella Napoli.


You don’t get much better than Bella Napoli as far as chicken parm is concerned (i haven’t gotten around to my story on the best chicken parm in the city yet…i will soon though. promise!). You can either get a chicken parm hero or a plate matched with ziti or salad. I opted for the salad today since I can’t afford to be sleeping on my keyboard this afternoon. The salad with nice and fresh, with big beefy tomatoes and fresh cucumbers, despite the fact that I splashed balsamic vinegar all over my desk. Definitely worth a visit for a nice lunch (and reasonable too – under $7 for the combo) or quiet dinner if you’re over in the midtown area. They make some mean pizza too, as evidenced by the lines that are out the door on a daily basis.

If you donta go to the bella napoli i’m gonna send the vito afta your assa. Capice?

Btw…just looked up Capice (pronounced ka-pea-shh) in the Urban Dictionary:

“Capice: Asking for agreement, understanding, belief. Answered with itself. Often used in italian mafia-type settings to emphasize understanding.”

Frank: “If you dont shutup, im going to bust your frickin head open with a baseball bat, capice?!”

Tony: “Capice”

Haha…awesome…gotta love the Urban Dictionary! Wonder if I can use Capice as a Scrabble word someday??? Hmm…I can imagine the conversation would go something like this:

Capice (on the board)

Opponent: Capice? That’s not a word!

Me: Capice is a fuckin word you fuckin asshole. Now that’s 27 points with the Triple Word Score. Put it in the fuckin books. Capice?! (brandishing my baseball bat, pocket knife and molotov cocktail).

Opponent: Ok…ok…it’s a word.


Time “Killing” Game of the Day April 4, 2007

Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in celebrities, funny, games, opinion, random references, sarcasm, travel, video games, world news.

Since its a gloomy and rainy Wednesday here in the NYC, its a great time to cheer yourself up with a family friendly game!  Today’s “time killing” game comes courtesy of Adult Swim (kudos to Juliana for the find!). 

The game is entitled: 5 Minutes to Kill Yourself.



Why are you killing yourself you ask?  Well your boss just asked you to come into another waste of your time meeting and frankly you’ve had enough.  So you use anything in your reach, staplers, scissors, lighters, talking to other coworkers, etc, to expediate your death. 

Not that I’m condoning such behavior, but as a game it’s fairly entertaining.  Definitely worth a play or two. Or ten.

Anyway, now that I’ve helped destroy corporate productivity in the workplace today, I’m reaching out to all of my British friends out there. In May, I’ll be making my first visit to London and I’m looking for any suggestions on fun things to do or good places to eat. I know the obvious “must-do” tourist attractions are Tower Bridge, Westminster Abbey, the London Eye, etc…but anything else you suggest I should see or do while I’m out and about in England is more than welcomed! You know fun things like swimming in the Thames, punching a Bobbie in the face, handing out Beckhams are Gods pamphlets, you know…fun stuff like that. I’m sure I’ll have plenty to talk about regarding British pedestrian behavior and the vast world of the underground, but anything “out of the ordinary” or off the beaten path you’d like me to check out I’d be more than happy too. Although if it leads to any jail time I’m knocking on your door for some bail money!

In other world news, I was deeply saddened to see that Pippi Longstocking passed away today. I’ve been a long time fan. Although I was surprised to see that she was living in Asia (Hong Kong) and she had her hair darkened and her freckles removed. Although it was no surprise to me that she was the richest woman in Asia, all those royalties she made off her movie and books deals must have been astronomical! But nonetheless she’ll sure be missed!


Scratching my basketball itch March 5, 2007

Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in basketball, games, nintendo, random references, video games.

So fresh off watching my beloved Marist College Red Foxes Men’s Basketball team get beaten by our arch-rival Siena Saints last night in the M.A.A.C conference semi-finals I’ve decided to hold off on my post-game analysis until the bitterness of the loss and anger from the loss dies down a bit. For those not in the know, the college I graduated from over a decade ago had their best team assembled since 1987 when former NBA player Rik Smits led Marist to back-to-back NCAA Tournament bids. They were a good team in 1995 but the infamous “Mustafa Barksdale” and the phantom 4 point play ended our NCAA Tournament hopes and sent us towards the N.I.T. So with our last postseason appearance being 1995 and having the #1 seed and a postseason appearance in this year’s N.I.T already locked down we were hoping to get to see Marist finally make it back to the big dance for the first time since 87. Alas it wasn’t meant to be as they had to play Siena for the second time within a week and Siena made the proper adjustments (and shot lights out all game) to finally defeat us. Didn’t hurt that our 7 foot center went 0-6 from 3 point land (my feelings for him were described in an early blog entitled “The Tallest P*SSY ever”). Anyway, as mentioned that’s a rant for another day since the blood is still boiling a bit.

Although one highlight of the weekend was watching our woman’s basketball team clinch their 3rd trip to the big dance in 4 years. The women’s team was far better than the men’s team this year, with their only losses coming to Duke, Maryland (defending National champs), Villanova (in OT), Yale (bad loss) and Loyola, MD. So congrats ladies on a job well done! They should receive an #11 or #12 seed so maybe this is the year they can actually win a game in the NCAA’s!

Anyway with March Madness in full swing and with my basketball itch just urging to be scratched, I wanted to share this cool article I found regarding the history of basketball video games. It’s pretty cool, especially for those who long for the games of yore like Double Dribble, Dr. J vs Larry Bird, NBA Jam, Lakers vs. Celtics and the NBA Playoffs and NBA Live 95! (here are some images to bring you back a bit)

Here’s the link to read the full article and view more images: http://www.ugo.com/channels/sports/features/basketball/games_2.asp

It’s a fun read and takes you through the history of gaming. Although they left out one of my personal favorites: Marv Albert’s talking basketball game for Sega Genesis. I would just play with the soundboard all game, making Marv say “Yes!” and “Yes, and it counts” time and time again. Good hours of wholesome family fun (and especially funny since those who know me know I have a great Marv Albert impersonation!). In fact he was long my idol and hero, until he bit that prostitute in the back. Although I won’t blame Marv for that. Everyone gets hungry every now and again. Just ask Mike Tyson and Evander Holyfield.

A lifelong goal…achieved? February 22, 2007

Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in asshole of the day, baseball, games, humor, nintendo, sports, stupidity, video, video games.

So continuing on this whole Nintendo gaming kick. I recently decided my next challenge from my gaming past was to try and throw a shutout in Nintendo Baseball. Yep, the original Nintendo baseball game with 6 teams that had letters to describe the team since they couldn’t use team licensing. So what they did was match the uniform colors to the team letter. The teams were: C (Cardinals), R (Royals), P (Phillies), Y (Yankees), D (Dodgers), A (Athletics).

The game was baseball in its simplest form. Nintendo baseball games got a lot better with the advent of baseball stars and bases loaded (yes Brian, i’m still working on getting that “footage” of Paste charging the mound in Bases Loaded).

Anyway, I’ve never thrown a shutout vs. the computer in Baseball. Its nearly impossible to do thanks to some internal “cheats” where the computer magically drums up some hits when they’re down to score a run. I mean I’ve blown the computer out several times, scoring as many as 30 runs. But pitching wise, it’s hard to keep the computer, or a human opponent for that matter, without a run.

I tried my quest with the Yankees at first and got to the 6th inning shutting out the A’s, but gave up a 3 run homer in the top of the 6th (I went on to win the game 18-5). I tried again with the Cardinals and got to the 4th inning, but a 2 run double ruined the shutout (final score 13-4).

In my frustrations I took a break. I regrouped and decided for one more run using the “pitching rich” Dodgers. I drew the Royals as an opponent, so my odds of throwing a shutout instantly increased (granted this is 1985 baseball when the Royals were decent).

In order to make the game go quickly and to concentrate on pitching, I bunted pretty much all game to get easy outs. Such went the top of the first, where i made three outs quickly. The Royals were the home team, and they threatened to end the shutout early with 2nd and 3rd and 1 out. But the generic lefty Dodger pitcher rose to the challenge with back to back strikeouts to end the threat.

The Dodgers went 3 up 3 down in the top of the 2nd as did the Royals in the bottom of the 2nd with 2 more strikeouts.

The third inning I decided to swing away and smacked a solo homerun to center field. I bunted the rest of the inning to keep the lead 1-0. Bottom of the third the Royals hit a leadoff double, but a pair of pop outs around a strikeout ended the threat. The middle innings were quiet, with the Royals picking up singles in the 5th and 7th, but getting no further. I decide to keep 1-0 lead in hopes the computer “cheat” would try to kick in if i had a big lead built up.

The bottom of the 8th brought drama as the leadoff batter for the Royals blasted a shot to left center. However I jammed him just enough to keep the ball in the park as it just hit the top of the wall for a double. After a clutch strikeout on a 3-2 count, an infield single put the Royals on 1st and 3rd with one out. The pitcher dug deep and after working a 2-2 count with mostly curveballs, I blasted a 90 mph fastball in on the hands to get a clutch strikeout. With two outs I kept lobbing in curveballs and induced a bouncer to the pitcher to end the threat. Whew.

I decided to keep the lead 1-0 going into the bottom of the ninth. The anticipation of being so close to my first Nintendo shutout was starting to make my palms sweat. I knew the computer was gonna come out swinging and they did, fouling off numerous pitches down the lines. I dug deep though and froze the first two batters with slow curveballs to two strikeouts looking. I had made both batters look like Beltran in the NLCS frozen by slow knee bending curveballs. I was beyond amped at this point.

Two outs. Bottom of the ninth. One out away from achieving a “life-long goal”…or at least a goal I had since I was a child.

My first pitch was an inside curve ball. Too far inside to nick the plate. My second pitch was an inside curve that hit the corner. Third pitch was fouled off deep to the right. Holy crap. That was close. He was on the curve. Do I go fastball and try to mix speeds up? It seemed by his swing he was looking fastball but got curved and fouled it off.

Then I made the fatal mistake of deciding to record this moment for infamy. In lieu of using my video camera since it’s non digital, I decided to use my cell phone. I had to position the camera in my lap to record the moment. I decided to go curveball inside to set up a fastball if the curve got fouled off. I was more worried about recording the event that I didn’t put as much snap on the curve as I wanted too. I wanted the pitch to go in and curve back. It was in on the hands but here’s the result (go to the blogger site to view the video):

Are you fuckin kidding me??? What an asshole I am. I knew that by recording the moment it was just asking for trouble. I could’ve just struck him out, took a picture of the screen and went from there (although some could’ve said, well you could have just been playing two player and “cheating”). So I did it legit and paid the price. Man, talk about clutch. I knew I should’ve went fastball. Devasting. So close. One strike away from a goal being fulfilled. Thanks to no extra innings in Nintendo baseball the game ended 1-1 after I struck out the next batter.

Although it did make for one of the best “live video game moments” of all time. It wasn’t like I grooved him a fastball down the middle. I was going for the strikeout and he basically crushed the ball off his hands. All it would need is Vin Scully’s voice to make it more dramatic. If I was a dork I would have audio tracked it, but don’t have that kind of time on my hands (maybe next time 🙂

I’m also willing to say that that’s one of the most dramatic and clutch homeruns of all time. Definitely ranks up there with Gibson’s HR, Puckett’s or Carter’s HRs in the World Series. If it had been a game winner could have been in the pantheon with the Yaz foul poul shot or the Bobby Thompson “Shot Heard Round the World”. Even if it didn’t take place on the “grandest stage”, those who have played Nintendo baseball know how high scoring the game is and how its very hard to throw a shutout.

Sympathy cards can be posted here if necessary or emailed to speedycdj@aol.com

Duck Hunt December 1, 2006

Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in games, nintendo, video games.
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So the game everyone loved from the ole Nintendo…yep the game where it was cool to shoot ducks on the screen with a gun (funny how Nintendo is back to making sticks to interact with games…how long ago did Duck Hunt come out???) is now available on your PC. Without a controller. Just use your mouse and that’s it.

If it doesn’t work here, you can go to http://www.gamereign.net/flash/duckhunt.swf

Sit back and enjoy.