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Joey! Joey! October 30, 2007

Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in current events, eating, food, sports, world news.


The “Tsunami” has done it again. After getting beaten around by Pat “Deep Dish” Bertoletti in recent competitions, my man Joey redeemed himself by eating an astonishing 103 Crystal burgers in 8 minutes to take the 2007 Crystal Eating championship!

You can check out the short Sportscenter vidoe recap here: http://sports.espn.go.com/broadband/video/videopage?&brand=null&videoId=3084545&n8pe6c=2

That my friends is un fucking real. The previous record was 97 by Kobayashi…so this was 6 better. How crazy is Joey’s feat? Well how about devouring an average of nearly 13 burgers a minute! Now before you run off saying they’re small, and that’s not a “real burger”…you try eating 103 of anything in 8 minutes and see if you can do it! Even some of the best eaters in the world only hit in the 40-50 burger range in 8 minutes. Over 100 is just un thinkable.

Personally I’m more of a White Castle guy myself, but having never had a Krystal I won’t knock it till I try it. Just word of advice, if you’re searching for Krystal in Google’s image search, let’s just say you’re gonna get a different set of “buns”:

I mean not that there’s anything wrong with those buns…but in case you happen to be in a public place, you may want to proceed with caution.

For those waiting for a story from this weekend’s bachelor party in Austin, I’ll have that and some pics for you shortly.

Thanks for your patience. πŸ™‚



1. roger - October 30, 2007

yeah saw that…fuckin crazy!! don’t know how he did that

2. trent - October 30, 2007

he’s a fuckin machine!

3. bubba - October 30, 2007

wow! now THOSE are some hot buns…god diggity damn!

4. nincompoop - October 30, 2007

i hope that’s what tiffany looks like πŸ˜‰

5. dean - October 30, 2007

i love how all those guys have nicknames…humble bob…haha. good shit!

6. howie - October 30, 2007

holy crap…yeah, i guess krystal has some brand reinforcement to do before the pop to the top of the image searches!

7. ben - October 30, 2007

suddenly i’ve lost my appetite for burgers today…

but suddenly I am craving a nice rump πŸ˜‰

8. gary - October 30, 2007

damn that girl is smokin!

9. candice - October 30, 2007

not for nothing those krystals don’t look too appetizing. or is that just me?

10. Mr. Blogger - October 30, 2007

i’m kinda with you on that candice. Definitely not my burger preference. But if I was drunk and looking for a snack I’d definitely indulge! Too bad they’re not up north so we can sample and compare to White CAstle.

11. bob - October 30, 2007

he is the man…no doubt about that!

12. Laurie Kendrick - October 30, 2007

Gee, what did I want for dinner tonight? Oh I know!! I”ll go ot What Pushes My Buttons because CJ ALWAYS helps me decide what I want becuase he ALWAYS includes the best food photos.

Hamburgers…THAT’S what I want. That is, until I saw the picture of the Krystal’s Babe.

Think I’ll just have a salad, you poster of photos-of-younger-thinner- women-who-with-the-way-they-look-are totally-busting-my-old-balls-if-I-had- them….BASTARD!!!!!

13. keywork. - October 30, 2007

If you still had them, Kendrick, if you still had them.

14. keywork. - October 30, 2007

Also, I might consider eating one of those Krystal burgers again if it was served on Tiffany.

15. Laurie Kendrick - October 30, 2007

SHUT UP KEY!! You’re just jealous…cause mine were always bigger than yours…and I never had any, tiny figs!!!!

16. keywork. - October 30, 2007

Whatever, Larry.

17. Laurie Kendrick - October 31, 2007

Keywork….Latin for “little girl”

18. tiffany - October 31, 2007

i actually prefer to be lathered in chocolate…for the record πŸ˜‰

19. keywork. - October 31, 2007

I’ve always been big on chocolate.

20. nincompoop - October 31, 2007

Actually i adorned tiffany in red roses last night. Let’s just say she had a night to remember.

So, I beat you to the punch key. Sorry buddy. Better luck next time.

Proof that “the poop” triumps over all!

21. tiffany - October 31, 2007

in your dreams nincompoop…in your dreams

22. janice - October 31, 2007

Tiff!!! how can you forget about the night WE had last night!?!?!?

There was chocolate galore. Cold milk. Hot bodies.

I can’t believe you would forget me that quickly 😦

But luckily we had a camera handy to record all the action! πŸ™‚


23. keywork. - October 31, 2007

Looks like you just got shot down, poop. Better luck next time. Good Morning, Tiffany.

24. jimbo - October 31, 2007


i would absolutely positively cream myself if i saw this in person! Actually i think i need to excuse myself for a bit.

25. tiffany - October 31, 2007

that’s right janice!!! how could i forget! and i wondered why i woke up surrounded by cats this morning? πŸ™‚

26. chris - October 31, 2007

LK: Sorry there girl..i have some pics of food coming right up though so don’t dispair! πŸ˜‰ And sorry about the hot chick…just trying to appease my male demographic once in a while! πŸ˜‰

Jimbo: hopefully you’re talking about the pic with the girls and the milk and not about the krystal eating championship!

Key/Nincompoop: love the rivarly going on here. may the best man…or animal, win!

Janice: cleverly done. thanks for making Jimbo’s day!

Tiffany: you’re starting quite the fan club here…try not to break too many hearts ok? and glad it looks like you finally got laid?

27. keywork. - October 31, 2007

Ladies love the raccoon.

28. Stiletto - November 9, 2007

Oh, pleeeez, she got no buns.

Just ask this dude:

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