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End of innocence August 6, 2007

Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in asshole of the day, bathroom humor, critique, current events, eating, food, funny, humor, new york city, opinion, sarcasm, stupidity.

So apparently our beloved Mr. Softee was delivering tasty treats of a different kind in Queens. Mr. Softee driver Jermaine Jordan was recently busted for dealing pot and cocaine out of his Mr. Softee truck.

“People would approach and place their order,” a police source said. “The bottom of their cup would contain their purchase, either cocaine or marijuana.”

Sweet. But what about those people who purchased a cone? Were the sprinkles laced with coke? Was the vanilla and chocolate twist soft serve laced with some good ole homegrown pot?

So I guess only those who purchased their ice cream in a cup were lucky enough to get the drugs. That’s the biggest form of discrimination I’ve seen in years. I’m a cone guy through and through. Waffle or sugar. Doesn’t matter. Who could resist the crunch of a cone while you’re biting into some soft ice cream. But why would you discriminate against us when you’re dealing out your leafy and powdery goodness?

Of course I’m kidding about the cocaine though…although pot I wouldn’t turn down. I mean if it’s being offered and all. Especially Mr. Softee pot. The street value on that shit is off the hook.

Mr. Softee, serving the best pot for 50 years



1. bubba - August 6, 2007

oh man…ice cream and cocaine…good stuff.

2. newman - August 6, 2007

hah…what was that line in talladegha nights? we go together like cocaine and waffles? haha

3. flanders - August 6, 2007

haha…nice…nothing is sacred anymore!

4. red - August 6, 2007

cones rule!

5. dean - August 6, 2007

guess there was more than sugar in those sugar cones!haha

6. bob - August 6, 2007

ha yeah…would you like some coke w/ that shake? hah

7. roger - August 6, 2007


8. ethan - August 6, 2007

Yankees SUck! Yankees Suck!

9. candice - August 6, 2007

ha…that’s why i’m a good humor girl 🙂

10. abarclay12 - August 7, 2007

I’m totally a cone girl, and I’d be pissed if I wasn’t given drugs. Seriously, that is not right.

11. nincompoop - August 7, 2007

surprised drug dealers haven’t used “push pops” to “push” their drugs on children

12. howie - August 7, 2007

Especially Mr. Softee pot. The street value on that shit is off the hook.

hahahaha nice!

13. Chris - August 8, 2007

Newman: Correct! Good stuff!

ABarclay: Tell me about it…i would’ve taken just a leaf in the bottom of my cone. Something, anything to show us cone peeps some love!

Nincompoop: you never cease to amaze me.

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