Food a-plenty October 10, 2007
Posted by whatpushesmybuttons in animals, bathroom humor, critique, current events, eating, food, funny, humor, movies, opinion, pedestrian behavior, random references, restaurant, sarcasm, sports, television, travel, world news.trackback
There’s a new king in town in the world of competitive eating.
Patrick “Deep Dish” Bertoletti, currently the #3 ranked eater in the world, has wiped the floor with Joey Chesnut in the past few days.
First, Bertoletti knocked off Joey Chestnut at the State Fair of Texas, winning the Waffle House World Waffle Eating Championship with a new record of 29 waffles in 10 minutes. Chestnut was the two time defending champion, but fell short by half a waffle.
For his troubles, Pat took home $3500 and the new Waffle House Belt, which was unavailable as of press time. No word if Pat also took home a year’s supply of syrup. (BTW…waiting for the Utah Flapjacks eating contest. That would be the breast! I mean best!)
Regaining his appetite quickly, Bertoletti then crushed Chestnut (get it, crushed chestnut – ha ha – I’m so witty) in a “Chicken Wing Chowdown” on Spike TV.
Pat devoured 4.1 pounds of buffalo chicken meat in eight minutes to take home the $25,000 grand prize! Not only did Pat hold off Chestnut, but he also knocked off Kobayashi in the contest (Joey ate 4.05 pounds for second while Kobayashi came in third, with 3.12 pounds).
Good stuff. I’m soooo looking forward to see who wins the Krystal Square Off on Oct. 28th. Bertoletti ate 76 Krystal’s to qualify this year. Although the record is still Kobayashi’s 97 Krystal’s in 8 minutes.
Speaking of eating feats, I happened to catch a show on the Travel Channel the other night about the Top 10 places to pig out.
The show was pretty good. Among my favorites were the 12 egg omelette at Beth’s Cafe in Seattle.
The eggs are fried on the grill and served up on a pizza plate with toast and hash browns. I’ve made some doozy omelettes in my days but don’t have a space large enough to make a 12 egg omelette. But I’d like to tackle that one day.
I’m also definitely down for the oyster challenge at the Acme Oyster House in New Orleans. You know I’m gonna try to battle my way on top of their Oyster Eating Contest leaderboard. Although there’s a long way to go to #1, as the top leader on their board downed 52 dozen oysters in 2-½ hours. I’m gonna have to bust out the “I Eat’M Raw” shirt for some extra inspiration.
Another challenge I’m up to trying is the Reilly Burger at Eagle’s Deli in Massachussetts. The Reilly Burger is named after local resident Sean Reilly, who devoured a six half-pound hamburger patties, quarter-pound of cheese (not quarter pounder w/ cheese – a QUARTER POUND of cheese). Before you think that’s nothing, he also polished off 5 pounds of french fries.
It took Reilly 2 hours and 7 minutes to finish the entire meal. Anyone who finishes the feat in the 2-½-hour time limit receives a full refund and their picture on the wall next to Reilly and his fellow overachievers, of which there are very few. I’d definitely be able to do the burger part. The fries I don’t know. That seems like a waste of calories to me!
Finally, the other challenge I’d like to embrace is the “World Famous, Free, Seventy-Two Ounce Steak Dinner” at the Big Texan Steak Ranch in Amarillo, Texas. The goal is to finish a 72-oz. steak, tossed salad, shrimp cocktail, roll with butter and baked potato in one hour. The meal is free if you can finish the whole steak and all the side items in an hour or less. 4,800 people have completed the meal out of 30,000 who have tried. I’m pretty confident I can add my name to that list. And I’m not lying either. I love me some steak. As long as they don’t make me dissolve all the grizzle and fat too, I should be all set (click picture to play the scene we all know and love!)
(Btw…no word on whether or not that was actually Keycoon, our favorite coon candidate for president, with a Swastika on his chest during his cameo role in The Great Outdoors. Stay tuned for his official announcement regarding this allegation.)
dude…there goes my appetite for lunch!
uh oh…looks like someone let the “coon” out of the bag!
you know…and just when i thought it was safe to vote for the raccoon…
don’t know how those guys do it…they’re amazing!
that’s pretty damaging evidence against Keycoon!!!
Bertoletti is a beast!! He’ll be ranked #1 soon enough the way he’s going!
btw…keycoon better have a great explaination for that one!
LOL at the ole 96′er!! That’s one of my favorite movies of all time!!!
see i told you you couldn’t trust a coon in the office!
NO way you finish any of those challenges!! not a one!
dude…keycoon…that’s pretty fucked up man. hope it’s not true
29 waffles!! that’s insane! he is the man..joey better step up his game!
love the old ninety sixer….gets me everytime!
i’m pretty disappointed in you keycoon
btw, all those meals are disgusting…yuck
Guys: hold off your criticism until keycoon can answer the allegations.
Trent: i guarantee I can do at least one of them. put it in the books. just need to decide which one i’m going after.
Gary: yeah, he’s moving up the charts quick. I think Joey’s got his work cut out for him considering Pat is 6 years younger.
well at least you know keycoon has the southern vote
you know i knew he looked familiar…he was in the great outdoors!!
although i don’t remember him hailing hitler…hmm..must have been in the director’s cut!
ouch nincompoop….are you trying to capitalize on that whole jena 6 nonsense??
Even though I’m a southerner i will not support a anti-semite for president!
throw in some paul bunyon hats for the kids…hahahaha.
i still think they should have shown him eating the grizzle and fat!
THAT FUCKIN OMELETTE IS HUGE….HOLY SHITTTTT!
The fries I don’t know. That seems like a waste of calories to me!
haha…you’re all about the meat huh?
Ouch…so not only is he a nazi supporter but he also hates Television!!!
http://kywork.blogspot.com/2007/10/kill-your-television.html
Who hates television????
He’s officially lost my vote!
yeah, that’s quite a rampage against the old boob tube their keycoon…don’t know if america is ready for someone with a potty mouth. also i guess since you eat garbage, it makes sense that you’d spew such rhetoric too!
I shall not be defeated by a raccoon man thingy.
I will order raccoons to become extinct immediately.
Your hate spewing, garbage rummaging days are over, Mr. Coon.
Hillary in 08!
the waffle house is sooo gross.
btw…not looking good their keycoon.
Ok, the still is obviously photoshopped. As for tv, read some of the pre-raccoon posts on my page.
Hillary-you remind me of a squirrel that tried to smear me. Hope you have more wits than he did.
hmm…it does appear to be a little photoshopped…although still a damaging position nonetheless.
and who’s this squirrel character i’ve been hearing about??? are their two candidates from the animal kingdom for president?
Thanks for stopping by to answer the question keycoon…i’m trying to track down whether the support was sympathetic to the Jay Squirrel run for the white house.
Barry: it’s true…keycoon has some competition in the way of a squirrel.
http://lauriekendrick.wordpress.com/2007/10/09/see-how-we-write-part-one/
Barry, I would hardly call it competition. Imitation is a high form of flattery, though, and I can appreciate this.
I’m taking a break in between interviews today and innocently decided to see how Key is doing (I had to leave him along with his coonstituents today) and all hell us breaking loose!! CJ, you’ve been accused of being a spy for Jay Squirrel???? What in God’s name is happening? I see a photo of my ex lover and current candidate de amor worshipping Hitler and then I learn that CJ is a spy???
Chris, go to the comments section of my latest post. Some anonymous asshole is accusing you of some backhanded anti Key shit. I’ve not talked to Key about it. I don’t know if he knows yet.
OH MY GOD!!!!
LK
Yeah, Chris, this needs to be explained.
Your silence is suspicious.
Hey guys…
Sorry…regular work called. I’m away from my desk for 2 hours and all hell breaks loose!
The last time I hung out with a squirrel was back in March
http://whatpushesmybuttons.wordpress.com/2007/03/28/sauget-does-not-heaven/
So that’s wayyyyy before any of this campaigning stuff. That and I only fed him popcorn, not campaign advice.
Definitely no spy here. Not sure where those allegations are coming from. But I’m a keycoon supporter all the way.
Although I did hear a rumor about a black bear also jumping into the presidency.
Ok, just checking, figured it was the squirrel. He’s done anyway. About the bear, I may need to hire a larger security detail.
Here’s the email I had gotten with the supposed picture above of keycoon:
———- Forwarded message ———-
From: “xterminator”
To: speedycdj@aol.com
Date: Wed, 10 Oct 2007 10:24:44 -0500
Subject: Fw: your raccoon friend is a sham!
What Pushes My Buttons blogger – your raccoon friend is a sham! A phony! He’s a nazi sympathizer. I have the proof right here.
coonnazi.jpg
41818 Bytes Download
-Anonymous
smells squirrely to me. Don’t be fooled voters, we have a long way to go.
This whole situation is scandalous!
Lovin it!
Fred, it’s only gonna get more scandalous as the election draws near. I’m ready to battle, you should be to. Vote KW in ‘08!
Key: I’m close to nailing down the source of the bear entrant…hope to have it shortly.
Roger that.
dude, I so totally love Waffle House but really? 29 in ten minutes? That makes me feel like I should put my head between my legs and be very still for a while to keep from BARFING.
also ps I HATE THE YANKEES. kthanxbai.
key – i’m having probs getting to LK’s site…everytime i go I get a popup for some domain registration thing…hopefully she’s paying her bills
if there’s any more drama just let me know…hopefully all the malicious squirrel rumors are put to bed.
“waiting for the Utah Flapjacks eating contest. That would be the breast! I mean best!”
you’re telling me…that would be a sight to see!!!
Haven’t had any problems over at her site, thanks for putting up the campaign poster!
I am truly saddened by the defeat of Kobayashi, but this guy is American, so I’m starting to love him. One day I hope to challenge his reign.
yes…well if you need me to set that up for you i definitely can. What would your discipline be?
I believe I would dominate in the following eating challenges: 1. Taco Bell Tacos 2. Blow-Pops 3. Bowls of Chicken Noodle Soup 4. Beef Jerky 5. Edamame 6. Laffy Taffy 7. Taco Bell Bean and Cheese Burritos
I know that’s cocky of me, but I have the heart of a warrior. Should I start training?
yes definitely start training…i’m friendly with a few competitive eaters so i can definitely try to work a challenge or two up for you.
we may need to go to siberia to train…to make stomach strong like bull.
btw…not sure if blow pops would be considered…i mean, you have to wait so long to get to the gum unless you just chew through the candy…that might be more of a marathon thing.
Are you more distance or speed eating?
[...] “Tsunami” has done it again. After getting beaten around by Pat “Deep Dish” Bertoletti in recent competitions, my man Joey redeemed himself by eating an astonishing 103 Crystal burgers in 8 minutes to take the [...]
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